Blog Archives

Best Relationship Advice for 2017

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If you want more fulfilling relationships with other people this year try this:
STOP posting the blow by blow all over social media, ENJOY your private moments and if you feel the need to share a photo? Do it when it’s over. Then try actually spending time with people while not being on your phone. This system is flawless it worked for thousands of years before there was social media.

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Are they talking about you?

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You have to REALLY (and I mean REALLY) not care what people say about you. Listen, you could make the best apple pie in the world and there is ALWAYS going to be someone, somewhere that hates apple pie. With that being said, people throw shade. Why? It makes them feel better about themselves.Sinful human nature caters to “better than, less than” people feel better about themselves when they have something or someone else to talk about. When you’re a mature, emotionally self-controlled person you realize that most often times people will accuse the very thing that’s in their own heart. If they’re corrupt, they accuse others of being corrupt, if they’re fake, they accuse other people of being fake, If they would shove millions in their own pockets if they ran a mega ministry, that’s exactly what they accuse others of, If they could never picture themselves with someone, they accuse the intention of the person who is. etc. They talked about ‪#‎Jesus‬ and sold Him out for 30 pieces of silver, we’re not that special that we’re going to be exempt, SO GET USED TO IT. The good news is, they don’t bother talking about you unless you’re making an impact or they perceive you as some sort of threat. Don’t believe me? Go ahead and google any person you think has significance.

Aggressive Faith

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Faith is an action word, it’s supposed to be aggressive not passive. People of faith shouldn’t be quietly sitting in the corner twiddling their thumbs, hanging on till Jesus comes. If God gave you a dream and a vision, your role in that is to do whatever is reasonably within your power to do and He will do the rest. God gives us all gifts and talents but your testimony isn’t going to sound like “well God gave me this idea, I sat on it for as long as I could and one day it magically jumped off the table, came to life and the end”. Sometimes we’re sitting around crying about our situation or finances and the answer you’re seeking He already gave us but because it’s not currently convenient or what we feel like hearing, we just waste time. God NEVER promised this walk would be convenient, but He did say He shall supply all your needs, He wants you to live abundantly, lack no good thing, etc. so get up, get aggressive in your faith and do the possible. God will do the impossible.
Philippians 4:19

John 10: 10

Psalm 84:11

Psalm 34:10

Matthew 19:26

 

 

Why won’t God just fix them?!

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You can waste years of your #life waiting for #God to “fix” someone else & never see it. Often times the thing that needs changing in our situation is us no matter how right or wrong we perceive the other person to be. If a person, situation, or behavior has you stressed out, annoyed, angry, or worried you’re what needs to change. See when we are TRULY new creatures in #Christ we should be manifesting the fruit of the Spirit so when something annoying is going on? You are supposed to respond in His image (love, peace, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control ) and until you do? Whatever is disturbing your peace or causing you to lose your self-control is going to keep repeating it’s self until that prideful you no longer answers the door.

International Women’s Day

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International Women’s Day (March 8) is a global day celebrating the social, economic, cultural and political achievements of women. The day also marks a call to action for accelerating gender parity.

International Women’s Day (IWD) has been observed since in the early 1900’s – a time of great expansion and turbulence in the industrialized world that saw booming population growth and the rise of radical ideologies. International Women’s Day is a collective day of global celebration and a call for gender parity. No one government, NGO, charity, corporation, academic institution, women’s network or media hub is solely responsible for International Women’s Day. Many organizations declare an annual IWD theme that supports their specific agenda or cause, and some of these are adopted more widely with relevance than others.

Source:
http://www.internationalwomensday.com/About

Are you failing at being Single?

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Believe it or not, most people absolutely fail at being single.  Yesterday was Valentine’s Day and a ton of people who are not coupled off took to social media to cry their woes. Being single is a topic most people actually desire more helpful information about but nobody will ask for it, because nobody wants to talk about it. For some reason society has painted us a picture of the ideal time to be engaged, get married, buy a house, have children, etc. and when we don’t live up to “social norms” we somehow have allowed this to make us feel “less than” in the area of relationships. This is especially true for folks who are living for the Lord. Soon as you make the decision to follow Christ and realize that pre-martial sex isn’t a part of the bargain, like clockwork the first thought that passes through most people’s minds is ” I gotta hurry up and get married”. Now before I continue, this blog piece is going to be more of an introduction summary. Reason being is that I actually have a book I’ve been finishing up on this very subject and by the grace of God will be available for purchase early 2017.

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The very basis for my book encompasses answers and strategies for this very problem, most people fail at being single. Did you know that 50% of today’s marriages end in divorce? It is my belief that much of this directly relates to them failing at being single. If you fail at being single, you’re going to make a mess or fail altogether at commitment. “Relationship hopping” is one giant red flag you’re failing at being single. No matter how tough or strong willed you think that you are, anytime you are in a relationship with another person (especially if it becomes sexual) you are exchanging thoughts, time, emotions, experiences, and creating a soul tie. ( and the two shall become one flesh-Genesis 2:24, Mark 10:8) There is a spiritual component inside the scope of relationships that generally most people ignore. We are 3-part beings, we have a physical body, we have a spirit, and we have a soul. Your soul is your emotions, it’s the part of you that remembers your experiences both good and bad and it is the part of you that shapes your reality. The more women a man sleeps with, the more lost he is. Every time the man “releases” he is depositing a part of himself into his partner. The more men a woman sleeps with, the more lost she is. Every time a woman sleeps with a man she receives a deposit from her partner. Reckless behavior with the very intimate beauty of who you were created to be by God Himself can pollute every ounce of your being and make you feel disconnected, drained, hopeless, used, tired, heavy, and cynical. Then what happens? Most people never heal, never let God rid them of the spiritual baggage they’ve inherited and instead they hop from relationship to relationship with every single hurt, pain, and disappointment they’ve ever experienced and even if a new relationship seems like a happy one at first? Eventually those feelings of hurt, pain, rejection, and disappointment reappear. Unfortunately we live in a society that caters to your ego and does not teach self-responsibility and pretty much just tells you “leave if you’re not happy” and instead of ever getting healed people hop from relationship to relationship with outrageous and unrealistic expectations that another person is somehow ultimately responsible for their happiness.

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Most people fail at being single because they don’t have a clue what is is that they need. Everyone has a long list of what they want, but rarely do we ever take the time to include God and ask Him what it is that we NEED. This can’t be successfully found if we are hopping from relationship to relationship and never taking the time to get rid of all the baggage we have picked up over the years physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Many people will pray for a husband or wife but never take the time out to be single and ask God to prepare them to be a husband or a wife. Marriage, relationships, and commitment are a job and a responsibility, real ones anyway. Your happiness is your responsibility, not another person’s. Before committing to another person, if we want the best chances of having a successful commitment we need to learn how to be “whole” by ourselves. Two half people don’t make one whole person but two whole people that come together form a bond that is not easily broken. We have got to seek God and make an effort to have our lives whole before bringing someone else in the picture. If you don’t have regular time you spend with God as a single person don’t expect it to magically appear because you get in a relationship. If you don’t know how to productively occupy free time as a single person, you’re setting yourself up to be absolutely miserable when you find out your partner is incapable of entertaining you every second of everyday. Being single isn’t a disease. It’s far better to be alone then in the wrong relationship.

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We live in a time where everything that flies through our media time lines or television is completely sexualized. Don’t make the mistake of confusing sexualization with committed love because they are two entirely different things. Committed love is not based on a feeling, it is a decision. One of the most important decisions you can make is a decision to not prematurely involve yourself in a relationship until you’re really ready and don’t let what other people are doing or what it appears like everyone else is doing be the standard you adapt for your own relational happiness. For those of you who have experienced a significant trauma (i.e. rape, domestic violence, sexual abuse) it is absolutely necessary for your own peace of mind and your future relationships that you get help and take the proper time to heal before you find yourself in a situation that you’re emotionally unable to handle. If you want to build a strong relationship that will stand the test of time, you have to first make sure that whatever you’re building is on a strong foundation or the house won’t stand. You are the foundation so make sure that you take the time to make sure you are sifted, mixed well, and formed before you start laying down bricks.

Keep a look-out for the full book “Living Successfully Single” by Queen the Prophet in 2017! 

@houseofestherct 2nd Annual Winter Drive accepting donations!

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House of Esther International kicks off it’s 2nd Annual Winter Drive to purchase blankets and socks for homeless residents in Connecticut and New York City areas. Every little bit helps, even $1 buys a pair of insulated socks for someone in need.

Many homeless individuals are battling untreated mental illness and at least half of homeless women and children are fleeing domestic violence.Consider being a blessing and check out the Go Fund Me page for this year’s drive!  

Shelter information for New York: 

http://www.homelessshelterdirectory.org/cgi-bin/id/city.cgi?city=New%20York&state=NY

Shelter information for Connecticut: 

http://www.homelessshelterdirectory.org/connecticut.html

#NationalBreastCancerAwarenessMonth

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October is National Breast Cancer Awareness Month!
Breast Cancer is the second most common type of cancer in women and 1 out of 8 women born in the United States is predicted to have breast cancer at some point in their life. Awareness and early detection are so very important! To learn more , find a fundraiser log on to :

http://www.nationalbreastcancer.org/breast-cancer-awareness-month

Introducing @houseofestherct by @realceliroldan

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House of Esther CT:

“Queen Esther’s story is one of boldness, great humility and discernment.  She trusted God to accomplish HIS purpose in and through her.Our prayer is that every time our apparel is worn YOU will wear it in BOLDNESS – Taking a stand for JESUS!” – Celina Roldan 

God has given me a vision for the House of Esther

A vision where God’s people proclaim BOLDLY he and only he is the KING of Kings!

I take pleasure in showcasing to you 

#FearfullyMade 

#GracefullySaved 

Apparel.

My hearts desire is that you will ROCK these inspirations with great style and most importantly, PRIDE.

You can visit House of Esther CT via houseofestherct.com and visit HE’s founder Celina Roldan at http://celinaroldan.blogspot.com/

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#Relationships101 Mistakes that women make by @queentheprophet

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Greetings Fam!

I wanted to talk about somethings that first & foremost I have done myself (See? Now nobody feels like I’m talking about them, I ALWAYS talk about myself first) and quite frankly, are issues I see all the time. I want to talk about them because these are the stupid things in life that cause big problems. So let’s chop it up about Mistakes WOMEN make in relationships.

 

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  • Make him pay for a heart he didn’t break:  If you are not over your last relationship, you are a selfish fool for getting into another one. Baggage has no place in a new relationship. When I say baggage, I’m not just talking about your ex. If you have messed up things unresolved with your father, if you are recovering from abuse and you did not get help? YOU BETTER if you ever hope to have a successful relationship.

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  • Running your mouth: Do you know Men HATE, HATE, HATE when their girl runs their mouth? There can’t be love without trust. If he can’t trust you to keep his secrets, then seriously what good are you as a partner? If you tell your friends something before you tell him? Did you ever stop and think about how that makes him feel?

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  • Double Standard: You can’t give anybody (let alone a man) invisible standards or double standards. Invisible Standard: You expect flowers on your birthday because they are important to you. You expect your partner to stay home with you every weekend.  (If you are the only person in your relationship that knows this, it is an invisible standard) Double Standard: You expect him to stay home with you every weekend until you have something fun to do with your other friends. You go through his phone but keep yours locked. (Double Standards. You’re setting him up because you switch up)

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  • Understanding: Your man is not a mind reader. Men are logic based thinkers and women are emotion based thinkers. Don’t “hint” at things, tell him exactly what you mean. Too many women get mad at men for just being men. Even if you leave several brochures laying around and stick a post-it on the fridge? He didn’t see it. He goes to the couch to sit, he’s not looking at the brochure on the table. If he’s at the fridge he is hungry and he’s not looking at the brochure taped to it. If you want to take a vacation, TELL HIM.

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  • The Counsel of your friends: Married women have no business hanging out with single women, point blank end of story. If you are a married woman and your closest friends are single? You are setting yourself up for a diaster anytime you start taking advice or counsel from single people.

If you are in a relationship and your friends are in the middle of a break-up? Please rememeber that misery loves company and even if it’s not on purpose? It can rub off and effect you.  Keep in mind “birds of a feather, flock together”. If you have a no good friend that’s always cheating everytime you two step out and that is who you CHOOSE to hang out with? It is a reflection of you somehow, someway, someday.

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