Did you know the word excuse is actually defined as “an attempt to lessen the blame, seeking relief of a duty, seeking to justify or defend”?
Some of the most common excuses I hear all the time are about loosing weight, saving money, not being able to fully be in a relationship again because they were hurt, and not being able to find a good job. An excuse is basically the same thing as a lie and unfortunately these are lies we most often tell ourselves.
Something becomes an excuse instead of a reason when you honestly haven’t tried everything. God gave us all a beautiful mind and if we truly want results and put our mind to it? It can be done. The question then becomes “How bad do you really want results?”
Everyone’s had their heart broken at least once, choosing to move on, heal, get counseling if need be are all a personal decision that requires a personal commitment. The same thing applies to finding a job. Most people never even bother to tap the free resource of their department of labor, which in many states offers free job training to underemployed adults or out of school youth. Saving money requires self control and discipline. There are so many free resources available online to help you budget, invest & save but people spend more time on social media then they do using the internet as an actual resource.
The point is, if you want to see results in any area of your life it’s going to require a committed decision, not excuses. Hold yourself accountable, ask for help, and utilize every resource available to you before you go throwing in the towel.
During the Summer, I have a few close friends (more like family) that entrust me with the responsibility of watching their kids. My oldest is 12, so she’s basically staff at this point and the others range from 2-10. On a full day (with at least 3 adults present), I’ve had 8 smalls. I’ve gotta tell you, having a classroom of 20 for a few hours in Sunday School is a whole lot different then having that many kids for two meals, two snacks and an entire day.
For anyone who has multiple children during the Summer months, I have found that creating a daily schedule and weekly menu helps tremendously in organizing what could potentially be chaos. All school age children have some sort of Summer Reading or Summer Homework that needs to be done so that should have a designated time. I have also found that listing “snack time” in-between meals prevents you being asked for a snack fifty thousand times. Recess, free time, arts & crafts also help take up some time slots. For my smalls, I’ve had all of them in Sunday School previously, so in my schedule we have a bible lesson also worked in.
For the little ones who can’t read yet or don’t have Summer Homework, I found a bunch of free learning apps on the for my I-Pad which I use with the little ones during this time and I also give the bigger kids reading credit if they choose to read a book to a smaller child. This helps the little ones learn to sit still which may not seem that important but it will be important when they start pre-school. Kids also learn from each other so don’t underestimate the impact of a bigger kid reading to a little one, most of them love it. In the back firing sense, I now have a two-year old goddaughter who tells me “sit” so she can read to me, which is mainly her flipping through the pages at top speed and going to get another book. Could be worse.
I know a lot of people don’t like to allow children to help clean up because they have to re-clean what the kids have cleaned. Honestly, that’s how I felt until I realized how much the kids actually enjoy helping so I try to give them tasks at the end of the day so everyone’s helping. For bigger kids? Give them the steam mop, it’s hard to mess up steam mopping unless of course it’s an 8 year old who decides it’s a weapon, then of course you’ll have to ban them from future steam mopping.It happens. I have also learned Lysol Wipes can be used on electronics and Clorox Wipes can not. So if you’re giving a kid a wipe (make sure it’s a child old enough not to eat the wipe), make sure it’s Lysol if they’re cleaning in a room that contains electronic devices. Also as a side note, don’t let them plug in the vacuum in the same room that an Air Conditioner is on or you’ll be taking a trip to the fuse box.
Rewards are also helpful. Kids love having something to earn or look forward to. I build in recess time because they have it at school and I have found it helpful to follow their regular pattern. I do Popsicle at the end of the day after clean up and I try to do a fun lunch on Friday (i.e. Pizza) if we have good behavior all week. Pizza can be expensive so things I’ve found helpful in that department is the party size pizza which is normally $20 and feeds at least ten people, Little Caesar’s has a $5 large pizza special (I have two kids with a milk allergy, but Little Caesar’s will make a sauce only and you can pay the extra dollar for meat), or you can do pizza bagels yourself.
I certainly don’t have all the answers folks, but the little I’ve included above has really helped me manage a lot of kids at once without loosing my mind. Hope it helps, feel free to comment below!
Thank you all so much for your continued support over the years. I appreciate everyone who has taken time out of their busy day in order to read an article posted here.
After much thought, I decided that I am going to start updating the categories and content featured here. I don’t really follow the social norm as far as blogging is concerned. I know a lot of folks pick what kind of blog they want and dedicate their posting around a certain topic. That never really worked for me because I like to represent on my blog what and who I really am.
I am a person who has worked (and still does) for over 17 years in the field of Human/Social Services working with families, children, and individuals with disabilities. I am a person who has worked and still works in the music/ entertainment industry not only as an artist, but in many different administrative functions. I am a person who has been an entrepreneur for over a decade and I am a person who not only talks about God, but someone who tries their best to walk that belief out in my everyday life.
I’ve done a lot of growing and maturing since I started this blog and someone very dear to my heart always has told me that everything God allows you to go through is to help someone else. So I feel inclined to give away everything that I’ve learned so that hopefully it will help someone else. With that being said, currently my life is so hectic I don’t fall asleep, I pretty much collapse at the end of the day. I am a full-time caregiver, I manage a full-time health staff and do 170 hours of payroll bi-weekly. I am a full-time care manager (which is someone who coordinates all health and community programs for an individual with a disability), I care for several children full-time Monday-Friday, I am the First Lady to Hell Razah’s (Wu-Tang Clan/Sunz of Man risendocumentary.com) Ghetto Govt Global Movement, I oversee the development and Management of two independent record labels, as well as work in my church administrative office while managing to make time for family and friends, and at some point attempt to work on my own music and book. Yes. I do all of this 7 days a week, I rarely get a break and if you ask me how, I can only spell out J-E-S-U-S, that’s how LOL.
So in my re-design, I’m going to keep a lot of things like music I’m involved with, interviews, Encouragement articles, Hip-Hop 101 for Independent Artists, and #TeamQueen but I really want to add a lot of stuff I’ve learned over the last few years like how to feed 8 kids on a budget, parenting techniques, time management, budgeting, and personal organization. I also want to address things that are important to me because after all it is my blog. I hope that you all will enjoy the updates, thank you all for your continued support!
I don’t think I’m alone in this, but it doesn’t even matter if I am or not. I am saddened, repulsed, disgusted and disappointed on a daily basis. At least for a moment. That moment happens when I open any given social media and see human behavior at an all time grotesque state. Unfortunately now in a digital world, you are slammed on a daily basis witnessing tragedy after tragedy, your eyes cannot help but see ignorance and hatred everywhere.
I know for myself personally as a believer in Yeshua, Jesus Christ I’m supposed to know these things would happen and I’m supposed to allow the Holy Spirit to lead me and guide me in these times, I’m supposed to let the love of God shine in me like a light for those around me in darkness and to be honest with you? Sometimes I want to quit. I get so disgusted every time I open a social media platform, every time I hear about another school shooting, see someone getting killed unjustly by law enforcement, watching people post some of the most vicious and hateful words I’ve ever read, and the children… My God the children. I can’t stomach one more senseless death of a child.
I had a moment the other day quietly by myself with God and just broke down like “Lord… how? How am I supposed to do this? I’m trying to do what you told me to do and I can’t “. I sat there quiet and an image of a Lighthouse flashes across my mind and then that quiet still voice, that has the capability of drowning you in perfect peace that you can only relate to if you have a personal relationship with God said “a lighthouse is most effective in the darkness.” I sat there and cried. Legit cried. The darker it is, the brighter the lighthouse light becomes.
So I decided to share this because believers have different positions, jobs, titles, but ALL have the same assignment. Your job may be inside a church, out in the street, at the grocery store, in your blog, at your office, in the mall, on instagram … it doesn’t matter. Don’t compare yourself to other believers, don’t get distracted from your job because you’re busy debating someone else’s job. We all get weary and yes, sometimes it “appears” that the wickedness is winning and there’s a lot of people who call themselves believers and their social media feeds make it impossible to tell them apart from people who don’t know Christ at all…. BUT we were told these things would happen (2nd Timothy 3:1-9). This is not the time to get weary (Revelation 12:11) it’s not the time to argue denomination or name translations (1 Corinthians 12:12). One day soon, people will be so tired of the state of the world that they will welcome with open arms one world order and a one world religion. If you turned off people’s phones and debit cards tonight, they’d line up by the thousands in the morning to take a microchip if it meant getting access to their money and the internet. (Revelation 13:16)
So my strength is renewed in this and I hope this will encourage those of you who have also become weary, they don’t have to like you. They don’t have to agree with you, they don’t have to listen, and they don’t have to believe. If you saw them crossing the street and a car was coming, you would yell , WATCH OUT! At that point they can make a decision to watch out or keep going. With something so precious as a soul and where you’ll spend eternity, I would never want to see anyone I knew or ever had any interaction with, standing before God being denied access to Heaven and seeing me there and asking why didn’t I tell them the truth. What would be a good enough excuse? Because I was afraid they wouldn’t like me anymore? What excuse or apology could I give? I can live with someone not liking me, I can live with people calling me names, I can live with someone disagreeing with me, but I don’t want to bear the burden of not telling them the truth.
So in whatever country, state, region, city, industry, or platform God has given to you personally? Be wise, win souls, and do not give up. It’s always darkest before dawn and someone, somewhere is looking for the light you carry.
You can’t use “God not stopping me” as an excuse for something you knew you shouldn’t do but did anyway. There’s ALWAYS a way of escape. Using it is entirely up to you. Every single time I ignored that? I was sorry. I don’t know about you, but I can’t afford any avoidable setbacks at this point in my life. 🤷🏻♀️
“No temptation has overtaken you except such as is common to man; but God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will also make the way of escape, that you may be able to bear it.”
I Corinthians 10:13
If you want more fulfilling relationships with other people this year try this:
STOP posting the blow by blow all over social media, ENJOY your private moments and if you feel the need to share a photo? Do it when it’s over. Then try actually spending time with people while not being on your phone. This system is flawless it worked for thousands of years before there was social media.